January 23, 2010

Use Your Spoon!

I must have said it 25 times, "Use your spoon!" I was getting exasperated. My adorable granddaughter, who will be 2 in a few weeks, likes to scoop her cereal and milk out of the bowl with her hand instead of her spoon. She will also use her spoon and does a pretty good job, but constantly uses her hands to assist with using the spoon, interchangeably. Then it dawned on my pea brain that for months we had taught her to use her little fingers to pick up food. I remember how delighted we all were when she was able to pick up food using two fingers instead of her hand in a fist, and place food gingerly and expertly in her mouth. What a triumph and we would all clap and praise her for it. Now, instead of praise, she gets my demanding "Use a spoon!" response. Doesn't seem fair, does it? And she must be a little confused. Where's all the praise for using her hands, even with liquid now? Hmm...

Just like a child, you and I are constantly being pushed to go another step in our maturity, our thinking, our doing of this life. At first we think it may be unfair, or not doable, or we just are too lazy to be stretched and matured. But it all makes sense, doesn't it?

A new driver starts learning behind the wheel with an instructor maybe in a parking lot or side street where they won't be in the way of other drivers. But that new driver will never learn how to make a safe left hand turn if he doesn't get into the intersection - of life. It takes experience and a willingness to grow smarter and stronger.

Thoughts for my day... Marylynn xo

January 17, 2010


I have two brothers. HA is single, in his 50’s, intelligent, funny and creative. His big, 6’2”frame is, however, carrying close to 350 lbs. This weight is causing problems such as back pain, fatigue, no energy, a constant worry to him. He is an alcoholic and drinks beer, which keeps the weight on and his stomach huge. I feel for him, because for most of his life, he was the smallest kid of all four of us, and always thin until the past 10 yrs. or so. But the beer….

He recently emailed me that he went 14 days without a beer, went on a strict diet and lost over 20 lbs! I was humbled and surprised by his comment, ‘Imagine what I would have lost trapped under rubble.’ So the beer money is going to Haiti. I’m very proud of him! And I admire his thoughtful perspective.

My mother, 90, lives in assisted living and has dementia, which she refers to as a total annoyance and disruption in her life. She knows she is forgetful and gets confused about many things, but it is not 24/7, so much of the time she can take care of herself and some of the small, simple details of her life. Lately, however, she is having a harder time just getting up in the mornings. Once she is up, had her coffee and toast, she is good to go the rest of the day. The hard part is deciding if she needs someone to come in early in the mornings to help her get going. That could be expensive, plus, Mom is against it, as she is still a bit stubborn about her privacy and lifestyle.

So my older brother, JC, who takes good care of Mom’s bills and bank accounts, suggested that he pay me (from Mom’s account) to give her the extra attention she needs more often now. I was struck by the thought that while I am unemployed and really need an income, I just wouldn’t feel as loving or caring if I was going over to Mom’s to care for her for the money. Should I pay myself to do what I would otherwise do out of a love for her? I also have to consider my hubby, who is disabled and unable to drive. I do many other things for him on a daily basis. I have to plan times to go to my Mom’s when I don’t have to do stuff for hubby. It is usually last minute, but I’m trying more and more to show up to help her regularly. I never thought about being paid for what I do for her. I am suddenly in a quandary.

I will seek God’s wisdom concerning this and make a decision this week. Everyone, take care, love God, be considerate and flexible.

Love, MaryLynn :)